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Saturday, 22 September 2012
Dredd 3D and The Raid
Since much has been made of the overwhelming similarity in story and setting between The Raid and Dredd, I've decided to combine their reviews into one write-up. As of right now, I watched The Raid on bluray last night and will be seeing Dredd 3D in a scant couple of hours with my old man for a classic father/son Saturday matinee. The reason I mention all this is because I'm intrigued as to how divergent stylistic approaches to what is essentially the same story appeal (or don't appeal) to me on different levels. Both films deal with law enforcement protagonists fighting their way through an army of reprobates, up level after level of an inner-city housing complex to reach a drug dealer kingpin at the top. The Raid is an ultra low budget, minimalist take on things with no stars, no comic book character baggage and no glitzy effects or 3D to speak of. The other comparison to be made is the tsunami of hype both films have rode in on. The reception, both critically and anecdotal from close friends, has been effusively enthusiastic, preemptively exalting them to the status of instant classics.
A good friend of mine who has long championed The Raid opined that I would likely prefer Dredd considering the premium I place on production value and stylistic flourishes. With Dredd a few hours away, that remains to be seen. What I can say for certain is that I found The Raid to be a remarkably underwhelming experience, and an intermittently unpleasant one at that. It has some thrilling fight choreography and a few inventively injurious moments, but I largely felt bored and uninvolved.
I presume the spartan, bare bones presentation that has so endeared it to most is precisely what turned me off. To my eyes, it's a flat, ugly, repetitive film with nothing to hang its hat on other than the fight scenes. Don't get me wrong, they're visceral and exciting, but everything in between is tepid death. Neither the good or bad guys have much in the way of charisma or screen presence, but that's what you get when your entire ensemble is nothing but a stunt team running through its routines on cheap sets with a little CGI blood splashed around to enliven the dreary palette.
I understand the idea was to frame the action in a rundown complex to explain away each floor looking the same, thus freeing up the budget to devote more resources to the fight scenes. But be careful with that money-shot carrot you intend to wag your audience with. It becomes unappetizing after being force fed the same one for 100 minutes straight. Once the moves started to repeat themselves and the fights became exceedingly samey (about a half hour in in my opinion), my eyes wandered to the insultingly uninspired and offensively cheap sets, which brought to mind those used on Eddie Murphy's Mr. Robinson sketch from SNL.
I will grant the film two astonishingly harrowing fight sequences that threatened to make it all worthwhile. Both involved a diminutive creeper with Jherri curl and were so punishing, they temporarily loaned the film the much needed high drama its story, acting and directing could not otherwise provide. Those two fights have incredible power and it breaks ones heart to imagine how immeasurably they could have added to a film with the other relevant elements in place. In summation, you wouldn't hire a plumber to do anything other than fix your pipes, so don't expect anything other than a few good fight scenes if you turn your whole film over to the stunt team and fight choreographer. The Raid was good for one clunky, sort-of entertaining viewing, but I couldn't imagine ever popping it in again. Now, off to see Dredd and to what level I'm susceptible to the dubious charms of superficial excess.
Ok. I'm back, and.....not good. Dredd is a beautifully shot, ponderously pointless slog. A turgid snoozer that gets by on its style, but much like The Raid, I couldn't even begin to fathom the possibility of sitting through it again. I don't know what my fellow film fans and critics were watching in the 80's to be comparing Dredd to those good-time-kill-crazy romps of yesteryear. The action films I grew up on such as Commando or Rambo First Blood Part 2 had humor and charisma. The testosterone laden stars of my youth had personality and presence. Karl Urban is a walking plank with no one-liners or cool moves. His Dredd a grey, miserable fascist with pursed lips and a fancy gun, scraping the chassis of his boxy motorcycle lazily across the cinematic finish line not a moment too soon. Lena Headey as the scarred, psychopathic crime lord Ma Ma turns in the only interesting work in the entire film, and even that is primarily because of how she looks.
Unlike The Raid, some scenes in the infinitely more accomplished Dredd are given room to breathe and develop in a dynamic way, as opposed to say, a dude turning a corner and everything erupting into choreography. There's a lot of nice world building and set design to distract from the 90 minute yawn that comprises the story. The villains visually convenient drug of choice (It's even called slo-mo! Ha!) gives the director plenty of opportunity to indulge in technical wankery. The sound design is a splendid cacophony as well and I would recommend seeing the film theatrically if you bother to see it at all. The 3D is decent and in my estimation worth the up-charge. It gives a great deal of dimensionality to the limited location and makes for some stunning uses of slo-mo.
Frankly, I'm pretty let down by both these films. Perhaps the excitable praise coming from all sides raised my expectations to a place mere meat and potatoes actioners simply couldn't live up to. More likely, those who saw these before me just had lowered expectations going in and were enthusiastic about the welcome respite from utter incompetence. Divorced from all expectations good or ill, these are simply joyless, boring movies lacking characters you can invest in or relate to. Whether filmed on plywood sets or a classy soundstage, these movies just don't strike me as being very fun or even having a reason to exist outside of as a calling card for the talented stuntmen and visual stylists that respectively assembled them. Better luck next time, movies.
Friday, 21 September 2012
Jeepers Creepers
I would like to preface this piece with a little information and a disclaimer. First, I am going to presuppose you have not only seen the film in question, but are aware of the directors troubled past. I highly recommend watching the picture as it's one of the best horror movies of the last 20 years, regardless of its creators actions, which I obviously consider abhorrent and unforgivable. Second, all ensuing theories I am about to postulate in regards to the directors intentions and psychological state are entirely my own. They are my carefully considered opinions based solely upon correlating the information I am aware of concerning Salva's past transgressions with what I read to be the subtext of the film.
I first saw Jeepers Creepers opening day, August 31, 2001 in a theater by myself. I'm a big fan of taking in Friday matinees of new releases before the crowds roll in. I had read some decent notices in the local papers that thankfully didn't reveal much in the way of plot specifics. This being pre-internet (for me in any case), I essentially went into it cold, having not seen any television advertisements or other promotional material. I was floored by its unremitting intensity, unsettling depravity and clever ingenuity. The first thing it brought to mind was the slashers of yore, Nightmare on Elm Street in particular. But there was something much darker about it. It seemed vastly more certain of its intent than some haphazard bogeyman origin story. It was assured, guided by a purposeful hand, so to speak.
The film making and story structure are absolutely beyond reproach. A timeless fairy tale, its power lies in its simplicity, as it does for other perfect horror films such as Texas Chainsaw Massacre or Night of the Living Dead. Yes, I would consider Jeepers Creepers a perfect horror film. It presents us with likable leads, introduces a menace, then proceeds to expertly ratchet up the tension, revulsion and terror until arriving at a bleak, soul-crushing finale. It creates its own world, its own mythos, and it does so with supreme confidence. These are the hallmarks for a masterful genre exercise. This film represents a clear vision being lovingly articulated by the man whose mind conjured it forth, and therein lies the problem.
When I first saw the film, I had no idea about its auteur's arrest, conviction and imprisonment for the (apparently videotaped) sexual assault of a 12 year old boy on the set of his first feature, 1989's Clownhouse. After learning this and re-watching Jeepers Creepers before the release of its sequel, I was, and continue to be flabbergasted these pictures were greenlit in the first place, let alone allowed to see the light of day. It strikes me as abundantly clear what sort of demons Salva was working through while crafting his magnum opus, and the shocking conclusions he appears to have come to concerning his own monstrous predilections.
Obviously, the creeper represents a sick extension of his desires and fantasies. A shadowy figure who derives his power and satisfaction from abducting young men and "taking" the parts he wants from them, so chosen by his ability to smell their fear. He drives around in a molester van, wearing a trench coat, terrorizing Darius (Justin Long) by smelling big handfuls of his dirty laundry, leaving his underwear strewn about a service station. Salva's sexual preference for young men not only informs every frame of his work, it turns genre expectation on its ear, portraying Long's Darius as the object of the creatures attention. He's the one constantly imperiled and put in compromising situations, his shirt being ripped to expose his midriff which facilitates a topless scene later while changing. These are the sort of paces a leering director would usually put a young starlet through to appease the horror genres predominantly male fan base.
Salva (and the Creeper, but more on that later) couldn't seem less interested in Gina Phillips' Trish, as either a character or eye candy for male patrons. She's primarily there to drive the car after the first attack, endlessly grinding its damaged gears, further aggravating the audiences already frazzled nerves. There's a bunch of icky, small touches where Salva equates terror with sexual arousal, such as the spent, seemingly post coital afterglow Darius and his sister (also:yuck) are clearly in after the Creeper runs them off the road. Just as in Creepers 2, there's an unnecessary urinating-in-a-field scene, apparently a Salva staple. A definite undercurrent of disdain toward and mistrust of traditional heterosexual relationships pervades the film with allusions to their unhappy parents and Trish breaking off her recent relationship for reasons not readily discussed.
The ultimate statement of the film comes in the final act. When trapped in a police station, the Creeper confronts Trish and Darry in an interrogation room and is forced to select which one to take as his victim. Policemen burst in, and after her pleading with him, he chooses to take Darry, plainly because she is not scared of him and Darry is, writhing helplessly in his grasp. This decision is visually represented (again, in an interrogation room in front of a phalanx of police officers) in an unarguably confessional fashion. The Creeper reveals his true form by elongating reptilian tendrils on his head and lets loose an anguished, pitiable howl. His choice has been made. He has revealed what he is to the authorities. We then cut to an abandoned factory, Darry's screams echoing through its bowels as some unspeakable torment is visited upon him. The stinger is a shot of Darry's naked, ruined body, the eyes removed. The Creeper rises up behind the corpse, peering unashamedly through the bloody, empty socket at the audience.
I interpret this as not only an admission of Salva's sexual desire for young, terrified men and the personification of the power he wishes to lord over them, but as him taking vicarious pleasure in the punishment meted out to Darius. By symbolically removing the eyes of the child who informed the authorities of his crime, he is freed to escape to a sort of safe mental harbor, represented by the abandoned factory, in which he can wallow in his misdeeds and re-experience them away from prying eyes. There is no comeuppance for the Creeper and no real judgement passed on him either. He's presented as without choice in the matter, an elemental creature merely acting on his demonic biology. As the psychic Jezelle says "He dresses like a man, to hide the fact that he isn't." A telling line of dialogue if ever there was, succinctly summing up how the director views himself, and possibly how he believes the world perceives him.
Seemingly emboldened by the films financial and critical success, Salva upped the ante with Jeepers Creepers 2, opening the film with a nightmarish abduction of a boy around 12 years of age, and it only gets worse from there. A stranded squad of shirtless teen 'ballers is leered at inside a school bus and picked off one by one in this feature length statement of guilt. The sequence where the Creeper hangs upside down at the buses emergency exit, sniffing at the glass orgasmically, fogging it up and licking off the condensation, is insanely egregious and altogether disturbing to watch.
These are sadly fascinating films. Extraordinarily well made artistic admissions of mental illness by a tortured soul. My appreciation of the films technical merits should in no way be interpreted as me condoning the directors crimes. His actions were reprehensible and I feel these films should be enough to merit further investigation into his current activities. I pray he continues down the straight and narrow path (pun not intended), using art as a means to explore his inner turmoil without inflicting any more harm.
Wednesday, 19 September 2012
'Talk Like a Pirate' Day -- It's ARRRRRsome!
'Real Housewives' Star -- Could Be Liable in Lindsay Lohan 'Accident'
TMZ Live: Lindsay Lohan's Arrest -- Tale of the Surveillance Tape
'Innocence of Muslims' Actress Sues Producer Behind Anti-Muslim Movie
Whatta Mars, Whatta Mars, Whatta Mars, Whatta Mighty Good Mars
Bruno Mars has long stood as a bastion of masculinity in the pop world—assuming you think that the ultimate signifiers of masculinity are pompadours, sunglasses, solid dance moves and a fetish for all things retro, which of course they all are. In case you have any doubt that Bruno is basically the combination Arnold Schwarzenegger and Denzel Washington of the pop world, here he is in a “Funny or Die” clip bossing out in just about ever possible scenario, as he is serenaded with Salt-n-Pepa’s “Whatta Man” in the background. To wit:
You get the idea. Or if you don’t, you could actually watch the video:
[Rap-Up]
The post Whatta Mars, Whatta Mars, Whatta Mars, Whatta Mighty Good Mars appeared first on Popdust.
Lady Gaga Smoked Pot on Stage in Amsterdam Because Why Not
When you’re an artist on the road, you’ve always got to make an effort to keep the fans on your side. For some musicians this means working on your stage banter, taking requests and shouting out local artists. For struggling singer/songwriter Lady Gaga, it meant that she went to Amsterdam and smoked up on stage, while wearing a shirt emblazoned with marijuana leaves.
We’re really looking forward to Gaga’s sensitive and nuanced take on local culture in the Italian leg of her tour. “Boy, that’s a spicy meat-ah dress-ah!”
The post Lady Gaga Smoked Pot on Stage in Amsterdam Because Why Not appeared first on Popdust.
Michael Turner APOLOGIZES for DUI Arrest -- 'It Was a Bad Decision'
Judge to Amanda Bynes -- Mess Up Again ... I'll Make You Pay
E! Is Stumbling Block for Khloe Kardashian to Host 'X Factor'
Lindsay Lohan -- Witness Says Actress Was NOT Drunk
Watch DMX Rail Against Computers, the Internet and Google
Good things happen when you let DMX rant in front of a camera.
Just last week X went off on Drake and his plan to release a posthumous Aaliyah album, now the rapper has visited Power 105.1 to share his opinions on computers and technology. Would you guess he’s against them?
DMX’s specific grievances:
On toolbars: “Look at all these things! There’s too much stuff. It’s scary. I’m my grandmother.”
On cursors: “Why does it do a line, then an arrow, then a hand? There’s too many things. … It’s confusing.”
On the pinwheel of death: “I see [other people] using it, and it in the middle of it, it’ll stop, and do the circle. I don’t have patience for that. … I’d break it.”
On tech company names: “Computer words are funny. … Just get a regular word. What is a ‘Google’?”
All DMX needs to do now is put his thoughts in essay form, and he could get a sweet gig writing op-eds for the New York Times !
The post Watch DMX Rail Against Computers, the Internet and Google appeared first on Popdust.
Lindsay Lohan Accuser -- Actress Was 'Slurring' and REEKED Of Booze
Wyclef Jean -- I'm NOT Mad at Lauryn Hill ... Anymore
Fred Willard -- Lewd Conduct Program was 'Just Like Traffic School'
Surveillance Video Shows Entire Lindsay Lohan Incident
Chad Johnson and Evelyn Lozada -- OFFICIALLY UNMARRIED
Lindsay Lohan -- Arrested for Leaving Scene of an Accident
Amanda Bynes -- Parents to the Rescue
Bam Margera -- Masturbatin' Intruder Secretly LIVED in My Tree
Dennis Quaid -- Sued Over Near-Fatal Horse Accident
Falcons' RB Michael Turner -- Reasonably Priced DUI ... Still a Really BAD Deal
Tuesday, 18 September 2012
Oprah vs. Prince -- The Old-Fashioned Fro-Down
Seven Shades (and Counting) of Psy’s Tuxedo Jacket
Over the past few weeks it seems like Psy’s been everywhere: teaching Britney to dance on Ellen, performing on the Today show, presenting at the VMAs, chatting on air with Ryan Seacrest, schooling the cast of VH1′s Morning Buzz on the fine art of faux horse-riding, showing up in the middle of an SNL skit and even popping up at a Dodgers game.
And as he shuffled and cavorted his way onto the national stage, the K-Pop artist has stuck fast to the posh “Gangnam Style” look immortalized in his viral music video. The man likes to dress classy and dance cheesy, favoring bold tuxedo jackets paired with white shirts, a bow tie (which, depending on the occasion, he may leave undone), slacks and black-and-white wingtips.
This recent publicity blitz reveals that Psy is not lacking in the wardrobe department, with what seems like a new jacket for nearly every occasion. From bright green and pink to classic shades of black and navy, we’ve charted Psy’s most notable toppers to date.
KERMIT GREEN
Psy pulled out this bright number for his Today show performance in New York’s Rockefeller Plaza on September 14.
DARK GREEN
Look closely. What at first glance appears to be solid black is, under closer consideration, revealed to be a textured jade and black stripe. This fancy option showed up on the VMAs red carpet September 6.
BLUE
The musician chose a blue jacket similar to the one he wore in his memorable video for an onstage moment with host Kevin Hart at the VMAs.
NAVY
For an interview with NY1 news, Psy went for classic navy.
PINK
This jacket, donned for an Associated Press interview, looks identical to the one that Psy danced around in by a carousel in “Gangnam Style.” We’ll forgive him for recycling.
TAN
Psy switched it up again with a tan jacket for an appearance on VH1′s Morning Buzz Live.
BLACK
In a moment that will live on forever in pop culture history, Psy teaches a confused-looking Britney Spears and an enthusiastic Ellen Degeneres how to dance the horse-riding dance.
The post Seven Shades (and Counting) of Psy’s Tuxedo Jacket appeared first on Popdust.
“How Can You Say That Zayn Malik Kid Is Prettier Than This…”
The Wanted boys are certified thrillahs in Manila. Yesterday at the Edsa Shangri-La Hotel, The Wanted Fanmily in the Philippines was treated to their usual antics, including man-crush confessions. According to Cosmo.ph, Jay is into director James Cameron, Tom likes Patrick Stewart, Nathan’s roots for Beckham, Siva is sweet on The Rock, and Max is mad about…Siva…
Let the rumors fly.
The post “How Can You Say That Zayn Malik Kid Is Prettier Than This…” appeared first on Popdust.
MLB Star Yunel Escobar -- I'm SORRY for Eye Black Gay Slur
TMZ Live: Amanda Bynes -- I'm Not Melting Down ... Despite Strange Shopping Video
Tori Spelling Hospitalized After Childbirth
How Do You Pronounce “Kreayshawn,” and Other Pop Star Names?
With the release of Kreayshawn’s debut LP, “Somethin’ Bout Kreay” this week, the hottest question of summer 2011 is again on everyone’s lips: “How do you pronounce ‘Kreayshawn’”?
Well, we’re in a helpful mood today, so we’re here to settle this, and other great pop-star name debates. How do you pronounce Kreayshawn? Like CRAY-shawn:
Now it’s time for some more! How do you pronounce Rihanna? Like ri-ANN-ah:
How do you pronounce PSY? Like SAI.
How do you pronounce Gotye? Like GAH-ti-ey (It’s a homophone for the French name, Gauthier):
How do you pronounce Wale? Like WAH-LAY:
How do you pronounce Tyga? Like TYE-guh:
How do you pronounce Sia? Like SEE-uh:
How do you pronounce Avicii? Like uh-VEE-chee:
How do you pronounce LoveRance? Like luv-RANSE:
Our conclusion? More artists need to say their names in their songs more. Like Mike Jones: No one ever asks how to pronounce that guy’s name.
The post How Do You Pronounce “Kreayshawn,” and Other Pop Star Names? appeared first on Popdust.
Steve Sabol Dead -- 'NFL Films' Founder Dies at 69
Dick Vitale -- KEEP AMANDA BYNES OFF THE ROAD ... Baby!
Creepa -- MTV Reality Star Arrested for Counterfeit Cash Scheme at Walmart
Hanson Gets Together to Cover “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together”
It’ll always be a little bit nerve-racking when a band covers Taylor Swift’s “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together,” for fear that they’re trying to tell you something about their future as a group with the song’s message. Luckily, former “MMMBop”ing brothers Hanson appear as strong a family band as ever strumming along to Taylor’s breakup smash, even working in some great harmonies to the solo number. Lead singer Taylor unfortunately takes a pass on recreating the phone conversation of the song’s final pre-chorus (“THIS IS EXHAUSTING!“) but he does get in the spoken word “Like…ever” of the first post-chorus, so we’ll forgive his omission. The chords on the bridge are pretty anyway.
By the way, wouldn’t “Taylor Hanson” be a brilliant(ly confusing) name for a DJ product mashing up Hanson and Taylor Swift songs? “Where’s the Love Story”? “I Will Come to You Belong With Me”? This is just the greatest idea we’ve ever had.
[ONTD]
The post Hanson Gets Together to Cover “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” appeared first on Popdust.
Alessandra Ambrosio --My Post Baby Body Is HOT!
Mitt Romney -- Gene Hackman Should Play MY WIFE in Hollywood Movie!
Amanda Bynes -- Strange Night in Hollywood ... Ends with a Chauffeur
Michael Turner -- Atlanta Falcons Star Arrested for DUI
French Court Shuts Down Publication of Kate Middleton Topless Pics
Amanda Bynes -- I Do NOT Need a Conservatorship
Mr. Belding -- I'm a Pro Wrestler Now!
'American Idol' House -- Renting Rooms To Fat People
Kristin Chenoweth Neck Injury -- Recovery Is 'Slow but Wonderful'
Jim Carrey's New Squeeze -- The Obvious Secret to His Hookup Success
Monday, 17 September 2012
Dennis Hopper's 9-Year-Old Daughter -- Congrats, You Inherited $3 Mil
Shaun White Mug Shot -- One Big Black Eye
Jon Cryer Bike Crash -- I Thought I Was Going to Die
Lady Gaga Pays Homage to Her Favorite Crazy Hatmaker at London Fashion Week
New York Fashion Week may be over, but fashion month’s just begun. The industry has moved its attention from the US to London, where London Fashion Week is now in full swing. And dwarfing all NYFW pop star sightings, none other than Lady Gaga showed up to surprise guests at one of the London shows.
Hot off a few appearances for the launch of her fragrance, Fame, Gaga was the first model out on the runway at milliner Philip Treacy‘s show. She chose a sheer pink shroud, crystal-embellished leggings and platform ankle boots for her grand entrance, declared the designer “the greatest milliner of all time,” then changed into a no-less bonkers Treacy creation resembling a motocross helmet made of flowers to watch the rest of the show. As gossip rags noted, the pop star’s love for the designer is so deep that she sat on the floor the entire time because the front row seats were full.
Gaga’s no fair-weather fan; she’s sported the Irishman’s attention-grabbing creations to many appearances and award shows. Some of her most notable outfits, like the sparkly, lobster-shaped accessory she showcased in London two years ago, the futuristic silver design she picked for the Grammys in 2010 and the hat that resembled a bird’s nest made of feathers she selected for the VMAs the previous year come courtesy of Treacy.
Click here for all the hats that made it down the runway and will likely end up in Gaga’s closet.
The post Lady Gaga Pays Homage to Her Favorite Crazy Hatmaker at London Fashion Week appeared first on Popdust.
Watch the Entire Will Smith Brood Show Off Their Talents in “Find You Somewhere”
What must it be like to to go a party at Will Smith’s house? If the video for eldest son Trey’s (performing as AcE) electro single “Find You Somewhere” is any indication, his family will make you stand around in a dark club and watch them all show off exactly how much more talented they are than you.
“Here, lay some beats for Jaden to rap over,” Will would urge, and you would, of course, because you would be thankful just to be included. You’d listen to Jaden freestyle a bit, and try not to think about how the little moppet from The Pursuit of Happyness is now a disconcertingly jacked teenager. “The kid’s kind of good, especially for a 14-year-old,” you’d think. “But why is he jamming these extra syllables into his lines?”
After that Willow would come out to do some ballet and then sing a little song and you would listen and clap along with everybody else when she was done, wondering exactly how an 11-year-old girl was able to sound exactly like Robyn. Voice lessons? AutoTune? Genetic engineering?
And then Jada Pinkett Smith would dance. When she finished, you would be ushered back into the night, left with only a commemorative EP and the vague feeling of inferiority to remember it by.
The post Watch the Entire Will Smith Brood Show Off Their Talents in “Find You Somewhere” appeared first on Popdust.
Prince -- Check Out My New Fro!
TMZ Live: Amanda Bynes -- Busted by Cops, Targeted by Lindsay Lohan
Jerry 'The King' Lawler -- Released From Hospital After Heart Attack
Amanda Bynes -- Bizarre Driving BEFORE Cops Impounded Car
Niecy Nash -- My Brother's 'Heinous' Murderer May Have Killed Again
Jon Cryer -- Helmet Saved My Life During Bloody Bike Crash
Seth MacFarlane on 'Ted' Sequel -- 'We're Thinkin' About It'
Ryan Lochte -- Jeah, I Heard About Seth MacFarlane's Impression
Lindsay Lohan -- I Went to Jail ... So, Why Hasn't Amanda Bynes?!
Enrique Iglesias -- I Don't Hate 'American Idol' ... 'It's a Great Show'
Jim Carrey -- Rebounding with HOT NEW Piece of Ass
Clint Eastwood -- Doesn't 'Give a Crap' About RNC Speech Critics
Amanda Bynes -- I'm Not Crazy
Miley Cyrus Fight -- Surveillance Video Clears Singer
'A Different World' Star -- My Deadbeat Ex ... Owes $40k In Child Support
Sunday, 16 September 2012
Junior Seau -- Chargers Retire Jersey No. 55 During Emotional Tribute
Marlon Wayans -- Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan Are 'A Crack Explosion'
Kate Middleton Topless Photos -- Italian Mag Has TWO HUNDRED Of Them ... Palace Seeks Injunction
'American Idol' -- Judges List Official, Randy Jackson Survives
Porn Company Offers an "Open Check" For Kate/William Sex Photos
John Travolta: Good Genes or Good Docs?
'Voice' Contestant Vicci Martinez -- Her Guitars Gently Weep After Car Crash
Guess Who This Lil' Man Turned Into!
Carrie Prejean -- Opposite Sex Husband Sells SD Mansion ... for a Loss
Kate Middleton Topless Photos
Saturday, 15 September 2012
Octomom -- Pulls Out Of Home Deal
Resident Evil:Retribution
The thing I've learned about films like Underworld Awakening, Resident Evil: Afterlife and just released Resident Evil Retribution is, aside from falling victim to the lamentable random surname generator sickness, they simply must be seen theatrically. In IMAX 3D if available. The Underworld franchise has moody style to spare and ridiculously overqualified British thespians hamming it up for the cheap seats, not to mention an intricate, lovingly cared for mythology that holds up to narrative scrutiny. The Paul WS Anderson directed films of the RE series rely instead on slick visuals, insane plotting and bombastic action set pieces to gloss over the fact that they're simply a bunch of shampoo commercial models running around unconvincing digital environments wearing laughable outfits. The pompous film snob who humorlessly resided in me 7 or 8 years ago would dismiss this sort of junk food entertainment sight unseen. The me of today finds much to love in cinematic sugar bombs such as this and I must admit, I had a marvelous time at my solo, 940 am IMAX 3D screening this morning.
I saw Afterlife in the same theater 2 years ago and had a blast then as well. The problem was when I bought the bluray and tried to watch it at home sans 3D on a puny 40 inch screen. Films like this don't hold up when they're not larger and louder than life. The Underworld films offer more to chew on during repeat viewings, with their host of bitter feuds drawn out over centuries and hissing, maniacal work from the likes of Bill Nighy. RE Retribution doesn't even bother making sense from scene to scene and burdens thespians like Boris Kodjoe and Kevin Durand with the lions share of dramatic heavy lifting. I'm not intimating I outright hate the bland, blank, airbrushed boneheads who populate this film, I'm just saying it's a recognizable step down from rounding out your cast with say, Stephen Rea or Charles Dance. So, I guess I keep circling back to how much I prefer the Underworld series for this sort of entertainment, but don't misunderstand me so quickly(to paraphrase Yul Brynner in The Magnificent Seven). Resident Evil Retribution was a goddamned, hell of a time and I enjoyed every moment of it.
I'm a fan of Anderson actually, having loved AVP, Soldier and the certifiably brilliant Event Horizon. But let's be honest, the dude is a shockingly derivative director, shamelessly pilfering from films he clearly loves and worships. There are many sequences in Retribution that brought to mind better films, but Anderson's palpable excitement and supreme competence as a technical craftsmen carries the whole affair off with panache. Tomandandy are back from Afterlife to provide the score and once again it is imminently listenable and cool as techno ice. There's no way to accurately describe how much dimension and style their music adds to the film. The CGI and 3D is executed well enough to not be too distracting during a thrilling, first time viewing, but will likely show its seams upon re-watch. There is some lovely shot composition throughout and the opening credit sequence is worth the price of admission alone to revel in its hollow awesomeness.
Jovovich's transcendent, unearthly beauty anchoring the film helps a great deal. She convincingly comes across as both steely and vulnerable, sometimes within the same action scene. Her physicality and presence is fantastic here, no more so than in the films standout moment, a simple hallway fight sequence early on that had me wanting to jump out of my seat with juvenile enthusiasm. She's a tremendous, totally unique lead actress. I'm thankful for this franchise chiefly in how it facilitates a starring role for her every couple of years. She has found a niche within this framework and I applaud her for dedicating herself to these films, consistently giving the fans what they want. Milla doesn't phone these in, and on a 5th installment, that sort of dedication should be commended.
The most interesting thing about the picture however, is Anderson's central story conceit involving clones and what is essentially an underwater holodeck. It's a telling parable for not only his style as a film maker, but for the depressing nature of film production today. This is purely market driven, tent-pole franchise, formula film making here. As a continuation from the previous film, the story makes not one iota of sense and the labored, viral test-scenario structure seems in place primarily to pander to the foreign markets by giving shout outs to their more well known locales, not-so-coincidentally where the RE films truly make their money. Familiar faces drift in and out, shifting allegiances, dying and resurrecting and I don't think it was ever made clear who they were in the first place. There's an extraordinarily complex essay to be written concerning the malleable, highly mutable and utter meaninglessness of the world these films exist in. One where plot points and characters don't matter and the reset button is hit every 15 minutes. The film is a copy of a copy of a reboot of an adaptation of a videogame. A cinematic focus-group snake swallowing its own tail ad infinitum, ad nauseum.
But I don't feel particularly compelled to tackle that essay right now. I'm still beaming like a besotted fool, drunk on the spectacle and guffawing at the silliness of it all. The other Paul Anderson has a film out next week and we can all stroke our beards at that as we did his previous masterpiece. For now, I'm happy to have had fun at the theater again. To get my money's worth and swim in the ether of mindless escapism for but a brief while. Not a bad way to spend a Saturday morning at all.
Britney Spears -- Braves the Heat for 'X Factor' Taping
Justin Bieber Will Most Likely Not Be In The Fifty Shades Of Grey Film
According to NME, Justin Bieber let it “slip” during an interview with TV’s Jonathan Ross that he has been approached to play a part in the upcoming screen adaptation of EL James’ steamy novel Fifty Shades of Grey. What part, he didn’t specify, but the book really only has one important character worthy of the Bieb’s attention: kinky businessman Christian Grey.
Unsurprisingly, the Beliebers are totally into it:
WHAT? OMG. WE WERE ALL DREAMING ABOUT JUSTIN BEING IN 50 SHADES OF GREY AND ITCOULD BE TRUE. OMFG. dailystar.co.uk/news/view/2722…
— BELIEVE♥ Janoskians∞ (@brittz_bieber) September 15, 2012
Others? Not so much:
noooooooooooo noooo NO BIEBER in 50 Shades NOOOOOOOOOOOO !!!
— RKEndlessLove (@kim_hatairat) September 15, 2012
We’ve read the books (OK, who hasn’t?) and while Bieber is quite the alluring figure to his adoring fans, unless 95% of the story gets PG’d and the film goes Pixar, there’s little to no chance Hollywood will be casting the pop star as misunderstood sexual deviant Christian Grey. If Bieber’s about to break into film (and we sincerely hope he doesn’t go the Timberlake route) why waste his singing and dancing talents on a film…with no singing and dancing? These hypothetical situations aside, Bieb would do quite well in a “Footloose”-esque remake (Zac Efron in “Hairspray,” anyone?)
Meanwhile, let’s let our national treasure age gracefully. And if by 25 he still wants to be in the Fifty Shades film? Well, it’s a trilogy.
The post Justin Bieber Will Most Likely Not Be In The Fifty Shades Of Grey Film appeared first on Popdust.
Rapper Webbie -- Alleged Battery Victim Says He Didn't Hurt Her
Kate Middleton -- Just Hanging Out During Topless Photo Scandal
Usher's Ex-Wife -- Shut Down By Custody Judge -- Again
Kate Middleton Topless Pics Bound for Italy
Amanda Bynes -- Serious Mental Issues
Harvey Levin Picks NFL Winner -- 'What's a Megatron?'
Floyd Mayweather Jr.'s Ex Josie Harris -- I'm Not Mad at Him for Beating Me
Amanda Bynes -- You Be the Judge
'Real Housewives of Miami' - Who'd You Rather?
Grateful Dead Accuser -- Drummer BASHED ME in the Tour Bus
Celebrity Clones -- Double the Star Power!
Old Navy -- Screws Up NFL Merch ... Orders MASS DESTRUCTION
Friday, 14 September 2012
Kate Middleton is a BIG Problem for Halle Berry
Heidi Klum's Bodyguard -- Text Offender
Joe Paterno -- Brown Univ. Will NOT Boot Coach from Hall of Fame
TMZ Live: Kate Middleton Topless Pics ... the Halle Berry Factor
Frank Ocean in “SNL” Ads: Stand Awkwardly and Wear an Awesome Sweater
Many obstacles exist in the way of Frank Ocean on his road to pop stardom, but perhaps none more than this: He doesn’t seem to really want it that much. At the very least, he doesn’t appear to feel comfortable in the spotlight, and though he’ll do the take the necessary steps of self-promotion—guesting on Jimmy Fallon, performing at the VMAs, and now appearing as the musical guest on this week’s Saturday Night Live—he takes no apparent joy in it, and usually looks like he’d be much happier hanging out in the back, applauding softly.
The ads for Ocean’s upcoming SNL episode, hosted by Seth MacFarlane, are fairly representative of Ocean’s natural shiftiness in the spotlight. The SNL promo spots are always terrible, and these are no exception, but Ocean’s presence makes this series weirdly transfixing. Standing alongside MacFarlane and cast member Fred Armisen, Ocean remains entirely silent throughout the series of ads, smiling uncomfortably and making faces and fidgeting like his mind is really back on whether there are still any donuts left at the catering table.
It’s near-comical in its awkwardness, though because he’s Frank Ocean, he still looks kinda like a badass while doing it—particularly because of his trademark bandana and his ridiculously awesome sweater with a phoenix on it or something. Here’s hoping he wears it on air Saturday night, we’re not ready to say goodbye to it just yet.
[Idolator]
The post Frank Ocean in “SNL” Ads: Stand Awkwardly and Wear an Awesome Sweater appeared first on Popdust.
Stacy Keibler -- Ring of Death
Honey Boo Boo's Dad -- On Crutches After 4-Wheeler Accident
French Magazine Editor -- Hints She Has SEX PICS of Kate Middleton and Prince William
NFL'er Antonio Bryant -- Arrested For Allegedly Strangling Baby Mama
Ex-WWE Diva Tammy Sytch -- Arrested 3 Times in 3 Days
Bam Margera -- Naked Chick Broke INTO MY HOUSE, Started Masturbating
Psy Ropes the “Today Show” Anchors Into Doing the “Gangnam Style”
It’s been a good week-plus for K-Pop professional Psy, who in the last ten days has cameo’d on stage with Kevin Hart at the Video Music Awards, taught Britney Spears how to do the “Gangnam Style” on Ellen, and has now performed on the Today Show stage with all the Show anchors serving as his backing dancers, in front of a rapturous Rockefeller Center crowd. Psy looks quite the boss in his lime-green jacket and sunglasses (the latter of which were also donned by much of the audience, sure to soon be a wardrobe must for PSYchos), and the anchors seem to be enjoying themselves a borderline-unhealthy amount riding their fake horses and swinging their fake lassos.
“Gangnam Style” debuts at #64 on the Hot 100 this week, and is currently at #3 on iTunes, sure to make a huge jump on the charts next week. Before you know it, you won’t be able to check out a library book without hearing the 75-year-old librarian humming “HEYYYYYY SEXY LAYYY-DAYYYY!!!” to herself.
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